Post by sinisterminister on Dec 12, 2016 23:32:06 GMT -5
The screen fades to Sinister Minister's locker room in Lowell, Massachusetts. Sinister Minister is seen sitting in a chair in the corner taping up his hands for his upcoming match. The door to the locker room flies open and Sinister Minister stands up immediately. American Tommy races into the room and runs into the bathroom. Sinister Minister shakes his head in displeasure and sits back down.
American Tommy: "Sinister, get over here, now!"
Sinister Minister: "Go fuck yourself, Tommy."
American Tommy starts banging and hitting the wall yelling Sinister Minister's name.
American Tommy: "Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister!"
Sinister Minister grabs his tape and stands up in a roar.
Sinister Minister: "God damn it, Tommy! Alright! Alright!"
Sinister Minister walks over to the door, cracks it while standing with his back to American Tommy.
American Tommy: "Have some respect when you come to talk to Harry Potter. Look at me in the eyes like a MAN!"
Sinister Minister: "Tommy, you are literally shitting on a toilet. This is not a time for a man to look another man in the eyes."
American Tommy: "I heard a man is most vulnerable when pooping. Like, you can look deep into his soul through his eyes, or some shit like that."
Sinister Minister: "You need to quit listening to the ramblings of that quack, Tokyo Zombie."
American Tommy is displeased that Sinister Minister has yet to look at him in the bathroom. He turns on the water faucet.
American Tommy: "If you don't look at me I'm going to piss all over your shoe, just like Benny Stevens will piss all over the back of your neck when you pick him up for the Confession! He may have been a stunt devil in his past life, but he's a total bitch nugget!"
Sinister Minister looks at the camera.
Sinister Minister: "You see the shit I have to deal with? If only I could send him back to his moth..."
Cameraman: "His mother? Why can't..."
Sinister Minister glares at the cameraman and scowls.
Sinister Minister: "Ignore anything I just said or you will never work in this company again."
Sinister Minister walks up and grabs the camera man by the collar of his already wrinkled brown shirt.
Sinister Minister: "Do we have an understanding?"
The cameraman shakes his head yes and Sinister Minister goes back to leaning against the wall. American Tommy puts his hand under the water faucet and starts throwing water at Sinister Minister's ankles. Sinister Minister furiously throws the door open and American Tommy is smiling with his hand under the faucet.
American Tommy: "What, don't you like R. Kelly?"
Sinister Minister rolls his eyes.
American Tommy: "It's about time I have your attention. We have to talk about this match tonight. More specifically, we need to talk about the opponents in your match. First, let us start with talking about Colgate Carnage."
American Tommy puts a finger in the air and grimaces.
American Tommy: "Hold on a second."
American Tommy grimaces and starts grunting. You hear a splash in the water and see a relieved look on American Tommy's face. He looks at Sinister Minister.
American Tommy: "Yah, that's all I have to say about Colgate Carnage."
A side smirk happens to fall upon the face of Sinister Minister, who glances at the cameraman, who appears to be laughing as well as the camera shakes up and down. Sinister Minister shrugs at the camera and American Tommy continues to speak.
American Tommy: "Next, we have Trinity Jones. Trinity, you know what I thought of when I first laid eyes on you? I thought, 'Damn, I bet she can swallow two bratwursts whole without even taking a bite.' I mean, yah. That's literally the only thing I've ever thought about you since I laid eyes on you. I didn't even know you were a wrestler here until 20 minutes ago! Don't worry, once you lose, Harry Potter will take you to McDonald's and let you pick anything you'd like off the dollar menu. I'll even be the one to ask for an application for you so you can pick an appropriate career for a woman."
American Tommy smiles.
American Tommy: "...and now we get to my favorite person to talk about, Benny Stevens."
American Tommy scratches his head and looks at the camera.
American Tommy: "Benny Stevens, you were a failure as a stuntman, quit the shit. It doesn't impress anybody and absolutely nobody cares. It's not like you're something awesome like, well, being Harry Potter. You talk about yourself being the measuring stick for all these people that have victories, like it actually means something. You fucking lost, bro. That's the only thing it means! You ain't no measuring stick. It means you are fucking shit. I have a picture example for you."
American Tommy stands up off the toilet cupping his junk. Sinister Minister turns away.
Sinister Minister: "What the fuck, Tommy!"
American Tommy ignores him and grabs the camera man. He drags him into the bathroom. American Tommy can be heard yelling instructions from behind the camera.
American Tommy: "Zoom in on the pile of shit! Don't fuck this shot up, I worked hard on this!"
The camera man regrettably does so, while gagging.
American Tommy: "You see that, Benny! That is a picture perfect display of what you are! Absolute shit! Absolute shit in a dress! Sinister Minister doesn't need to speak when I'm around. Not only do I breathe Shakespeare, but I shit out Picasso! Not only am I the wizard that saved the wizarding world, but after Sinister Minister pins you in the middle of the ring...I'm going to be the one to finally flush your shit stain wrestling career down the toilet!"
American Tommy tries to reach over the man to flush the toilet, but he can't reach it.
American Tommy: "Flush the toilet man! That was my climax!"
The cameraman flushes the toilet and Tommy pushes him out of the bathroom. He sits back down on the toilet.
American Tommy: "Close the fucking door, mate. What are you gay or something? I'm trying to wipe here!"
The cameraman closes the door and zooms in on Sinister Minister leaning against the wall. He shrugs at the camera.
Screen fades to black.
American Tommy: "Sinister, get over here, now!"
Sinister Minister: "Go fuck yourself, Tommy."
American Tommy starts banging and hitting the wall yelling Sinister Minister's name.
American Tommy: "Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister! Sinister!"
Sinister Minister grabs his tape and stands up in a roar.
Sinister Minister: "God damn it, Tommy! Alright! Alright!"
Sinister Minister walks over to the door, cracks it while standing with his back to American Tommy.
American Tommy: "Have some respect when you come to talk to Harry Potter. Look at me in the eyes like a MAN!"
Sinister Minister: "Tommy, you are literally shitting on a toilet. This is not a time for a man to look another man in the eyes."
American Tommy: "I heard a man is most vulnerable when pooping. Like, you can look deep into his soul through his eyes, or some shit like that."
Sinister Minister: "You need to quit listening to the ramblings of that quack, Tokyo Zombie."
American Tommy is displeased that Sinister Minister has yet to look at him in the bathroom. He turns on the water faucet.
American Tommy: "If you don't look at me I'm going to piss all over your shoe, just like Benny Stevens will piss all over the back of your neck when you pick him up for the Confession! He may have been a stunt devil in his past life, but he's a total bitch nugget!"
Sinister Minister looks at the camera.
Sinister Minister: "You see the shit I have to deal with? If only I could send him back to his moth..."
Cameraman: "His mother? Why can't..."
Sinister Minister glares at the cameraman and scowls.
Sinister Minister: "Ignore anything I just said or you will never work in this company again."
Sinister Minister walks up and grabs the camera man by the collar of his already wrinkled brown shirt.
Sinister Minister: "Do we have an understanding?"
The cameraman shakes his head yes and Sinister Minister goes back to leaning against the wall. American Tommy puts his hand under the water faucet and starts throwing water at Sinister Minister's ankles. Sinister Minister furiously throws the door open and American Tommy is smiling with his hand under the faucet.
American Tommy: "What, don't you like R. Kelly?"
Sinister Minister rolls his eyes.
American Tommy: "It's about time I have your attention. We have to talk about this match tonight. More specifically, we need to talk about the opponents in your match. First, let us start with talking about Colgate Carnage."
American Tommy puts a finger in the air and grimaces.
American Tommy: "Hold on a second."
American Tommy grimaces and starts grunting. You hear a splash in the water and see a relieved look on American Tommy's face. He looks at Sinister Minister.
American Tommy: "Yah, that's all I have to say about Colgate Carnage."
A side smirk happens to fall upon the face of Sinister Minister, who glances at the cameraman, who appears to be laughing as well as the camera shakes up and down. Sinister Minister shrugs at the camera and American Tommy continues to speak.
American Tommy: "Next, we have Trinity Jones. Trinity, you know what I thought of when I first laid eyes on you? I thought, 'Damn, I bet she can swallow two bratwursts whole without even taking a bite.' I mean, yah. That's literally the only thing I've ever thought about you since I laid eyes on you. I didn't even know you were a wrestler here until 20 minutes ago! Don't worry, once you lose, Harry Potter will take you to McDonald's and let you pick anything you'd like off the dollar menu. I'll even be the one to ask for an application for you so you can pick an appropriate career for a woman."
American Tommy smiles.
American Tommy: "...and now we get to my favorite person to talk about, Benny Stevens."
American Tommy scratches his head and looks at the camera.
American Tommy: "Benny Stevens, you were a failure as a stuntman, quit the shit. It doesn't impress anybody and absolutely nobody cares. It's not like you're something awesome like, well, being Harry Potter. You talk about yourself being the measuring stick for all these people that have victories, like it actually means something. You fucking lost, bro. That's the only thing it means! You ain't no measuring stick. It means you are fucking shit. I have a picture example for you."
American Tommy stands up off the toilet cupping his junk. Sinister Minister turns away.
Sinister Minister: "What the fuck, Tommy!"
American Tommy ignores him and grabs the camera man. He drags him into the bathroom. American Tommy can be heard yelling instructions from behind the camera.
American Tommy: "Zoom in on the pile of shit! Don't fuck this shot up, I worked hard on this!"
The camera man regrettably does so, while gagging.
American Tommy: "You see that, Benny! That is a picture perfect display of what you are! Absolute shit! Absolute shit in a dress! Sinister Minister doesn't need to speak when I'm around. Not only do I breathe Shakespeare, but I shit out Picasso! Not only am I the wizard that saved the wizarding world, but after Sinister Minister pins you in the middle of the ring...I'm going to be the one to finally flush your shit stain wrestling career down the toilet!"
American Tommy tries to reach over the man to flush the toilet, but he can't reach it.
American Tommy: "Flush the toilet man! That was my climax!"
The cameraman flushes the toilet and Tommy pushes him out of the bathroom. He sits back down on the toilet.
American Tommy: "Close the fucking door, mate. What are you gay or something? I'm trying to wipe here!"
The cameraman closes the door and zooms in on Sinister Minister leaning against the wall. He shrugs at the camera.
Screen fades to black.